


Forget The War

by Jahaliel



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: "and i would have done it too if not for that meddling kid", Crosspost from tumblr, Fix-it fic, Gen, Space IKEA: causing Jedi to be tempted by the Dark Side for 200 years, crack - kinda, hand-wave fixit but i think that still counts, the council gets its collective heads out of its asses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-08 23:47:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12264537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jahaliel/pseuds/Jahaliel
Summary: Palpatine comes up with the evilest plan.Who needs a war when there's Space IKEA?





	Forget The War

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the lovely Merfilly's drabble about Space IKEA <3
> 
> Because lets face it Space IKEA is going to be. frustrating.

Forget the war, Palpatine thought to himself. All he really needed was chaos among the Council of Jedi. Pompous windbags the lot of them but perhaps if they fell and then some handpicked weaker replacements… But how?

The Council had been called and Mace Windu was running late with caf in hand. The doors opened to reveal a very disgruntled High Council. Sans chairs.

“Where in all the Sith hells are our comfy chairs?” He asked the room at large  
“Know we do not.” Answered Yoda, ears twitching.  
“Can we just cancel the meeting for now?” requested Depa, “Perhaps source some replacements?”  
“I second that motion” called Master Koth as he stalked from the room to go find some unsuspecting Knights in the salle to pounce on.

The Chancellor was so sorry to hear about the vandalism of the Jedi Orders property - and how fortunate it was that they did not place value on material things. (Mace’s internal monologue at this point was mostly Huttese) “But fortunately, the Senate have voted that we provide our peacekeepers some aid and I have personally organised the delivery.”

The next day the Jedi High Council room is full of boxes. From Space IKEA. Three hours in and twenty missing screws (Palpatine stole some just because he wanted to be extra mean) later and there was no serenity in that hallowed room.

–-No words will do justice to the amount of anger, swearing and utter emotion that was to be heard but please imagine it here. Some eyes were definitely taking on a touch of golden hue —

Unfortunately for the Chancellor someone had the bright idea to say “Hey, Kenobi's padawan, Skywalker, he’s really good at mechanics and things isn’t he? Maybe we should ask him for help.”  
“He’s ten.”  
“And nearly 900 some of us are, but struggle we do.”

Cue Anakin coming in with his teacher and being like oh Space IKEA. I can do Space IKEA. Kenobi has his i’m-not-laughing-at-these-Masters face on as Anakin whirlwinds his way through the mess the Councillors have made of the chairs  
“Oh, Obi-Wan, I mean, Master.”  
“Yes Ani?”  
“We’re going to need more screws - I have some in our quarters but…” at this point Anakin is half buried beneath what appears to be some sort of combination of chair legs and arms.  
“Alright, Padawan, I’ll be back in a moment.”  
“Thanks Obi! You’re the best.” Anakin blushed a little at his slip in front of the Masters but when no-one commented he returned to fixing the utter mess they’d made of the furniture.

Plo was the first Master to ask if he could help - which resulted in him finding himself with a handful of chair arms “Just hold onto these for me, would you?” And slowly the rest of the Council began to assist. Master Yoda engaged in some frivolous Force use to help separate out the parts while several of the others went out and returned with food and drink for all of them. Obi-Wan returned with the screws to hear laughter coming from the Council room - it did his still-aching heart good as he stood for a moment and listened to his young Padawan laughing at the stories that the Councillors were telling - apparently it had become something of a contest, whoever told the most outrageous story would get to have the first completed chair.

He handed over the screws to Ani, and in return was pulled down to sit with his Padawan, handed a strange hex-shaped thing and told to start tightening various bits and bobs. By the evening meal all the chairs were complete, and Anakin shyly offered to make modifications to them as they were pretty standard to better accommodate the Councillors.

“Very generous you are young Skywalker. A kind heart, you have. Accept your offer I will.” Yoda’s agreement was quickly seconded by every other Councillor there  
“But another time, I think” said Mace with a smile “I think you deserve a break Padawan Skywalker. And thank you.”

The fear the Council had of the Chosen One, their frustrations and concerns melted away that afternoon and though it would be several years before Palpatine was arrested and executed his plans failed on that day.


End file.
